Gifts of the Heart
A Christmas Reflection……It seems the holidays we have been experiencing come around more rapidly every year. I remember as a child hearing old folks like me make this statement and I couldn’t believe what they were saying. It felt just the opposite to me, Christmas seemed like forever coming and as the countdown of days till Christmas began around Thanksgiving, it seemed like Christmas would never come.Back then I approached Christmas with tremendous expectancy. I mean I really looked forward to it. And as it drew near my excitement and anticipation reached unbelievable heights and spilled over into my sleep each night, keeping me awake with anticipation.I’ve thought about it and have decided that these childhood emotions, like so many, held deep clues about how to relate to life.Those who make it their career to study the human experience have noticed a kind of inherent wisdom among the young. Lots of folks have commented on the admirable attitudes and traits of the young. We all speak of holding on to aspects of life that are more typically abundant among the young. We want to always be young at heart, to keep our spirits young even as our bodies age.And so as this Christmas season approached I tried to recapture a measure of that youthful excitement and anticipation. And in so doing, just maybe I could make this Christmas one of the special ones.I think it is particularly appropriate to find ways to nurture our excitement about the future. To me this is precisely what Christmas is all about. It is fundamentally and simply a reminder that hope, and positive expectations and anticipation are valid orientations to life.A few weeks ago Harry shared with many of us some pictures taken by the Hubble telescope. I have a friend who works at NASA, a real rocket scientist as we say, and he’s also shown me pictures like this. Looking at these images and gazing into the light unpolluted night sky on my farm is a humbling experience. In one of the pictures taken by the Hubble there is a galaxy that is at least 1000 times larger than our solar system. We can’t tell just how much larger than our solar system it is but we know it is at least 1000 times larger.My rocket scientist friend tells the story of aiming the Hubble in an area of space where there was thought to be nothing. He said seven weeks later what came into view were galaxies and solar systems greater than all the previously observed systems in space.If images like this don’t convey the vastness of the mystery we are caught up in I don’t know what could.To me the Christmas story is an awesome story about the all powerful One, the One behind and responsible for this vast mystery, reaching out from within this vastness in generosity extending a message of hope to us all; a hopeful message that it’s O.K. to be caught up in this mystery and a hopeful message that it’s appropriate to anticipate, to expect goodness and meaning can be ours as we accept and take our journey through this mystery we call life.Look at that first Christmas, a seemingly hopeless situation, a struggle against overwhelming circumstances and yet out of that modest place, out of barn on a cold dark night mankind was offered the most powerful guiding light; deep clues as to how to make the life journey the gift its Giver intended it to be.For me Christmas offers a powerful message that it’s O.K. to be caught up in this vast mystery and the reassuring message that all of our moments, even the seemingly hopeless ones, can be the prelude to wonderful new tomorrows.I’ve lived a while, 66 years, and I’ve come up against devastating experiences, experiences too difficult for me to understand and I have found the Christmas message of hope to be true. I have found that if we are open to it God will meet us in our moments of loss and despair and will help us rise from those times to experience wonderful newness of life and hope. With loss and despair there is, through God’s help, as Paul Harvey use to say, the rest of the story. If we are willing to trust that all the goodness that God has for us in this gift of life is not over, then we can get up from our down times and find new joy and meaning. Christmas says this to me.And Christmas shows me, points the way to seize this hope. You know what it is? It’s the giving, the generosity that God exercised, the love extended to us; this is the deep clue that shows us the way to seize hope and be overcome with excitement and anticipation.One of the great lessons of this season is the how to part of the Christmas message. Christmas promises us that the tough times are not the defining times. Christmas assures us that the mystery is still unfolding and that new days, full of meaning and joy, are out there on our life paths. And Christmas also points the way, shows us how to make this hope real.It’s the giving. You want to claim God’s assurance that this life gift is a good gift, then be like God. Be a giver. It’s the giving that opens the door to hope.The message Christmas offers is a reminder that you and I, like God, in whose image we are made, are also givers. And that as we give expression to who we really are, as we become the givers we were meant to be, we experience the joy and meaning we were meant to experience.So I’m trying to let Christmas reinforce and grow me in this realm of giving. And I’m trying to give the best gifts, gifts from the heart, gifts out of love for and mindfulness of others. And I pay attention to others, the generous ones, who are making real the promise of hope because their actions instruct me and make me a better giver.I try to study at the feet of the good givers because they are the fortunate ones. They know how wonderful the gift of life can be and they know that difficult and challenging times can’t block or defeat this wonder, this meaning, this joy. Like God, they know the power of generosity. Think of it, the all powerful One gives expression to this power through love, through generosity.And there are lessons all around us as to how to do this.A couple of days ago there was a piece on the news. A family was put onto the street because their house burned to the ground. Some one, a stranger, seeing an account of this on the news contacted the TV station, got in touch with this family and got them shelter, clothing and gifts for Christmas. This woman was interviewed and asked why she did this. She responded, “Are you kidding, this was my Christmas present to myself. I’m having the best Christmas ever.”I heard about another man who was handing out money on a street corner. And he was asked, why? And he said, “It feels so good. You should try it sometime.” I bet it would be an incredible experience and I bet it would have a ripple effect. Just like the day a stranger in the car in front of me paid my toll at a tollbooth, I do that too now and I bet some of those strangers whose tolls I have paid are paying the tolls of others.Again on the news Friday there was a story of a marvelous woman, almost totally paralyzed by muscular dystrophy that is a bell ringer for the Salvation Army. Her friends and family roll her in her bed to the store where she uses her last remaining functioning limb to ring the bell. And as she was interviewed she had the glow of joy that only the most fortunate of us experience.On the Internet this past week I saw a series of pictures taken of a man who jumped into the cold water to rescue a dog. And the last picture in the series was one of him. He had that same glow about him.And I take instruction from others and from books and movies like Pay it Forward and Magnificent Obsession, Lloyd Douglas’ story about a troubled young man who found himself and the true joy that the life gift can be through exercising generosity. Generosity became his magnificent obsession.And the O’Henry fable, the Gift of the Magi; you remember that one. A young man sells his most prized possession, a gold watch, to buy combs for his wife to use for her most prized possession, her long beautiful hair; not knowing that she had sold her hair to buy him a chain for his watch.Through instruction like this I try to be a more and more accomplished giver. And I’ve noticed the best gifts, like the TV commercial says, are the ones that are not available in any story. They are the gifts like time, like forgiveness, like thoughtfulness, like listening; gifts like caring, like simply being there, gifts like a caring mindfulness of others.And man are these wonderful gifts to receive. You know it too. I’ve been blessed with many of these. And they truly are treasures. Treasures like a note I got the other day from an old friend sharing love and appreciation. Gifts like what you sent me Kathy, and you Susan, the information about these new approaches to pain management.And gifts like the affirmation from friends in Southern Pines, people who will always be dear to me; and like touching base with a dear friend who shines a light on my path.The example of others, the gifts others give to us as well as the gifts we hear others offering, these examples are wonderful instruction as to how we can get better and better at this business of giving and thereby seize the goodness and hope God offered that cold night in Bethlehem and continues to offer us all.Of all the things we can offer to one another, of all the advice and guidance we can share with each other about how to have a good life, there is nothing more important than the guidance we can offer each other about how to get better and better at this business of giving.Whoever said there is no such thing as true altruism, was dead on right. Whatever benefit our generosity has for others, it tremendously benefits us.And so I’m excited again. I’m back there where I was as a child, caught up in excitement and expectation, getting back to that sleep disturbing level of anticipation. And I’m already giving and receiving, opening up wonderful gifts. And I’m getting better and better at taking a proactive approach to this giving, really putting some thought into the giving.Four of us, dear friends, with a long history of knowing each other, planned and carried off a wonderful weekend together a couple of weeks ago. It was an awesome gift. We sat around, told stories, laughed and bathed in the wonderful gift of friendshp. And looking back on it a couple of days later, one of these friends said, what a wonderful time. The love between us all is so apparent.I’m giving some letters to other old friends and I’m giving my sons a letter, sharing what I hope are some words instructed by life experiences and sharing my love for them.New friends, people I’ve only known a little over a year, have moved on to the farm where I live. What a wonderful gift.A man I use to work with came by the other day and we took a ride up to visit someone we use to work with. What a wonderful gift. Another very special day.A man who use to be my student sent me a device, an ultraviolent light therapy device to see if it could offer my painful ankle some benefit. I was touched, still am, by his thoughtfulness and generosity.A stranger got my address from a friend and sent me a note telling me something I had written to this friend had been shared with him and touched him. What a wonderful gift.I’m doing another concert for my mom, practicing some of the old hymns she loves and playing them for her in a telephone concert.Several of us living on the farm had a party a couple of weeks ago. Melia and her friend Debbie trimmed the tree with 50 little stockings and in each one was an opportunity, an envelope, to give to orphaned children. Everyone went home from the party with a wonderful gift certificate, an opportunity for special generosity.I’ve made it a point to bring a joke with me every time I visit my doctor or my physical therapist or go to the store and I’ve offered them with good results to friends and strangers.I’ve been visiting a little more regularly an old equine friend, one of my four legged friends, bringing him the kind of treats he likes and rubbing him between the ears where he likes to be touched. He lets me know how much it means to him and I really enjoy our visits. Don’t forget animals were an important part of the Christmas story and are our partners sharing the life gift with us.My sons, including an adopted one, along with his wife, were here for Christmas. We drew names again this year. The way we do it is you go out and buy yourself a gift from the person whose name you drew. You wrap it up and put it under the tree. The suspense Christmas morning isn’t seeing what you received. It’s seeing what you gave. And it’s entirely appropriate to exclaim upon opening your gift, “Oh my, how did you know. This is exactly what I wanted.”Finally, remember, the Christmas message is so powerful because it shows us a winning path, not just for this season but for all the seasons of our lives.It gives us the powerful message that, even though we can’t begin to imagine the vastness of all that is, that we are a loved part of it and that it is more than O.K. to find ourselves in possession of this gift we call life and that one of the powerful reasons it is O.K. is that hope always lives on and love always remains, even when all seems lost.Christmas says to you and me that hope lies all around us, that the good stuff of life, you know, love, forgiveness, caring, companionship, the beauty of nature, and art, beautiful stories of which we can be a part; Christmas says all of this is ours, waiting for us to claim.Now if that doesn’t excite you, if that doesn’t heighten your expectation, nothing will. Christmas points the way to realize the longing of our hearts to have these most precious gifts.And it’s through being like God; it’s through stepping out into the mystery of life and calling for these gifts through being givers that we find life the gift God intended it to be.And how do we do it. How do we call for love, for forgiveness, for nature’s beauty and power, for a beautiful story, for the gift of art and beauty, for the power of human kindness? We simply do it by being love, by exercising mindfulness and thought toward others, by extending our love, our forgiveness, by participating in opportunities to be a part of a beautiful story, by drawing close to nature and the beauty of art, and by being an instrument of kindness to others.These are the gifts an expectant heart longs for and these are the gifts that can keep our spirits excited and can fuel our hunger for more of this mysterious gift.And the beautiful thing about these gifts is that our hearts long for them in all the seasons of life, not just in this season and the good news is they can be ours all of our days.And so I invite you to embrace the gift of assurance and hope God extended us all that cold night in Bethlehem so long ago and keeps on offering us. Know that hope never dies and that this hope is yours. All you have to do to seize it is be like God. Be like you were made to be. Be a giver and hope will never leave you.POST SCRIPTIt can be a hard time of year, this holiday season. It can be a time of year when we can be reminded of what is missing in our live; when we compare our lives to those around us who seem to be blessed by loving families who are close and draw closer around hearth and home this time of year; a time when we sense that we aren’t like these; when we look at these fortunate ones and judge our lives as lacking a significant measure of this hearth and home. Feeling our aloneness is particularly hard this time of year.Well, let me tell you something. There is simply in my opinion no valid reason to accept participation in this mystery we are caught up in outside of the opportunity to be a loving, giving being. I know of no other way to make sense of the mystery. I know of no other way to make sense of the inevitable trials and challenges that make up life and no other way to address the pain of loneliness.All of us want the good life. All of us want to have the good stuff. Beyond the attainment or satisfaction of our basic physical needs, food, shelter, clothing; stuff, material things, cannot give us the good life. The good life is the life that knows love, the life that knows forgiveness, both the giving and the receiving it, the life that notices beauty, the life that is moved by and participates in powerful stories, and the life that gets real familiar with the stuff of human kindness. This is the stuff of the good life. And what more powerful reminder of it than a story about the all powerful One reaching out in generosity, giving the greatest possession of all, in a powerful act of generosity; God, the one behind and within the mystery, choosing to be love, choosing to give the greatest gift.The One we counted on to bring us the good ole days can be counted on to bring us good new days. All we have to do is follow His example and be the generous ones He made us to be.Merry Christmas. May God bless you.
