Reflections From the Past
God in the Ordinary
A couple of weeks ago, I was driving to Harry’s house for a brainstorming session. We hold these sessions about once every 6 weeks to generate new ideas for services, and this particular day, I had nothing. I was completely empty of ideas.
SO on the way to Harry’s, I turned off the radio and I began thinking about the types of topics we typically explore and it occurred to me that what we’re doing many times is examining some aspect of the human condition; those ordinary experiences that touch all of our lives. This thought led to the idea that if I were to go through my day, I would inevitably come across something that resonated with me spiritually, and if I was lucky would inspire a theme for a service.
Now before I share what I discovered in examining my day, I want to clarify what I consider to be a spiritual experience, or the experience of “God”.
Up until now, my idea of what “God” is has been only a feeling that I’ve struggled to verbalize, it’s been more of a picture in my mind.
I expect that what I imagine God to be will change as I continue through my life, but for now this is what I believe.
I believe – if our eyes were powerful enough, we would see that we are swimming in a thick, dense sea of energy waves. A sea so thick that we wouldn’t even be able to see our own hand if placed in front of our face. Energies like: sound waves, microwaves, all electrical currents, and the energy that is created through our actions, thoughts and intentions are swarming around us and through us. And all impact us in some way.
I believe that like energies attract like energies and therefore the energies of love, compassion, and all good intentions existing in the world, combine to create a united energy, a river or current that is more powerful and more intelligent than all other energies combined. This is how I imagine the “Source” or “Divine Spirit” or “God”. To me, “God” is a grand permeable force of love, intelligence and all that is good.
I believe that humans, as well as all other living things, act as both transmitters and receivers of this energy or Source. When we act with love, compassion, empathy, when we’re being creative, and any time our intentions are good, we are transmitters, putting God energy into the world and connecting with the greater “Source”. When we open our hearts and minds to all that is, we are acting as receivers of that divine source and we’re able to tap into this power whenever we need.
So keeping all of this in mind, I will take you through a day in the life of me and show you how I discovered grace in the everyday ordinary tasks of my life – when I felt I was transmitting and receiving or connecting to the divine spirit.
1. The perfect morning for me would be one where I wake up very slowly. I would be lying among crisp, clean fresh linens knowing that I was awake and also knowing that I had the luxury of lying there as long as I like. When I finally open my eyes, the room would be sunny and I would feel completely refreshed and ready to start my day.
Unfortunately, that is NOT how I start my typical day. Instead, the room is dark and I am either awakened by the alarm clock, my kids, or my husband’s urgent call “It’s time to get up!” I have to hop out of bed and immediately begin making breakfast, packing lunches and getting my kids prepared for school.
Did I mention I’m not a morning person? Well I’m anything but. I would really love to be, but instead I’m quite cranky and prefer not to speak at all. Yet despite this, despite the fact that I struggle to fully function for a good 30 minutes after rising, I am somehow able to be a caring, loving and attentive parent to my children during this morning rush. Somehow I am able to suppress the fatigue and sluggishness I feel and allow my kids to experience a calm start to their day. And let me tell you this is no easy task!
But when I see my kids smiling happy faces in the morning, somehow I’m given the strength to not only endure, but to be, for my kids, a caring, nurturing parent. I believe it’s connecting with their love, receiving their unconditional love that allows this transformation within me to happen, and we all benefit. God is in this.
2. I was driving my kids to the dentist last week and we were driving through a very rural area, when I heard my daughter say, “Look at the cows! Look how pretty the snow looks on the hills! It’s looks like a rainbow.” My son dreamily answered, “Yea it sure does.” It felt so good to hear them expressing an appreciation for nature and the natural world. I hope they never lose that. Taking in the landscape has always made me realize just how small I am and that there is a power greater than myself. And there is God in that.
3. While the kids are at school there are a number of things that I do to fill my week. I volunteer at school, I take cello lessons, prepare for Journey’s, exercise, clean house and plan and cook meals.
Housework – Perhaps there are some things that are just not spiritual. Housework is definitely not my favorite task and not something I do everyday, with the exception of one thing – I always clean and straighten up the master bedroom.
I have a much higher tolerance for clutter than my husband, so I could live without the bedroom being tidy for more than a couple of days, but I know that for him, coming home to a clean home makes him really happy. It is much less stressful for him to walk into our room and see it clean and neat. And it’s not something he has ever asked me to do. I just do it. It’s a small gift that I give to him each day; it’s an expression of my love for him, and I know he is grateful. And there is God in that.
4. Then there’s exercise, well I certainly don’t do this as often as I’d like, but when I do, I find that it’s a really good time for me to center myself. Walking or jogging can be meditative for me. I fluctuate between being very aware of the beauty around me or transfixed by the rhythm of my motions. Often, I’ll repeat the prayer of St. Francis while jogging or swimming, and aside from the fact that the rhythm of the words works well with my movements, repeating the words fills my spirit and inspire me to think beyond my own needs and there is God in that.
5. Cello lessons – I’m not going to pretend that my cello playing would make anyone feel like I was tapping into a greater intelligence. I am very much a beginner. But there is something interesting about this decision to take cello lessons and the path that it has led me down.
First, it was very difficult to find a teacher, but when I did, it turns out she lives a little over a mile away. And when I first met her, I left the lesson thinking “She is so nice. How lucky was I to find a cello teacher is so accomplished, yet still so passionate about teaching a beginner like me.” I was really impressed by her and I thought that she was just so kind.
And then, after my third lesson, we started having a conversation about our families and I told her about my son Nick and his autism diagnosis. That is when she revealed to me that she too was autistic. She had been diagnosed a few years ago with Asperger’s Syndrome, which is a high functioning form of Autism.
I was shocked. Me, of all people, should have been able to pick up on this, but I saw no signs. I told her how impressed I was with her; that she showed no obvious signs. She explained that giving lessons was a very comfortable environment and one that was someone scripted. Even so, I left there with so much hope for my son. This young music teacher was married and living in a home she and her husband bought, and they just had a baby. If all this was possible for her, it could be possible for Nicholas too.
As I continue to take lessons and we continue to get to know each other and to share our stories, I can’t help but think we were brought together for so much more than cello lessons. I truly believe we were both transmitting an energy of need that brought us together. And God is in that.
6. Something I’m very passionate about is volunteering at my kid’s school. It’s a real confidence booster for my kids to see me there, and I get to be creative and make a difference. My current project has been to create an after school clubs program and it’s really exciting to see it all come together. The one club that I am most excited about is a club I’m calling “Connections”. This group will explore what it means to be connected in the world and give the kids the opportunity to create and implement their own outreach programs. Not only have I been able to use my creativity, but I’ve been able to do it in a way that is going to make a difference in our community and hopefully in the lives of these kids. It’s my pebble in the pond moment and God is definitely in that.
7. Another thing I’m passionate about is cooking. I don’t always plan my meals ahead of time, so going to the grocery store is not a quick “in and out” thing for me. But that’s okay because I love to go grocery shopping. I go no less than 3 times a week and it is by far our biggest monthly expense. But I really enjoy walking around thinking about what I’m going to make, thinking about the colors and textures on the plate, and what will taste good together, what my families going to enjoy. I love finding new recipes and I am thrilled when I make something new that everyone enjoys. My intentions are to keep my family healthy and to please their palates. I do this out of love for them and God is in that.
8. My kids get home from school at 3:45, so I try very hard to stop whatever I am doing at 3:00 and use those last 45 minutes before they come home to relax and to recharge my batteries. I might read or lay down, but the important thing is to be still. When I take the time to do this, I am a much happier mom and better able greet my children with enthusiasm and excitement that we are together again. And there is God in that.
9. Once my kids are home from school, all focus from 3:45 until dinner is on them. I help them with homework, converse about their day, make sure they practice piano and fix them snacks. This is the time when I need to be really receptive to my children’s body language and mood. They’re tired and sometimes upset about something that has happened at school, but they’re not ready to talk about it right away and I need to be sensitive and in tune with how they’re feeling. As St. Benedict said, I need to try and “Listen and attend with the ear of [my] heart.” And God is in that.
10. At dinner, we always sit down together. We try to always say a blessing of gratitude and, though it often takes some prompting of the kids, we share our stories of the day. Sometimes it’s the only time my husband and I have to really sit and talk about our day, and sometimes it’s the only time we have to really listen to each other. And there’s God in that.
11. After dinner, my husband takes over with the kids. Typically they go upstairs to the playroom and play until bath time, which he also does. This is a gift he gives to me, but it’s also his time with the kids. My husband becomes a kid again when he’s playing with them and I really enjoy listening to their sounds of laughter as I clean up the kitchen. Their connection is so pure and deep. And there’s God in that.
12. Once the kids are in bed, before I do anything else, I make a cup of tea and sit. I may read or watch tv, but this time is a time of peace, comfort and gratitude for me – and there is God in that.
I usually stay up later than I should and it’s quite often it’s my husband’s suggestion that finally sends me off to bed. Perhaps, I’ve always been a night-owl because I’ve been trying to stave off the inevitable – another day with the same routine. But I have to say, writing this reflection has given me a new perspective on my life and all its ordinary “routineness”.
Marianne Williamson in Everyday Grace wrote:
‘Spiritually, there is a lesson in every moment: When we are seemingly stuck in a boring routine, the miracle lies not so much in finding something else to do as in realizing how much we can do in any single moment – through the power of our own consciousness – to transform ourselves and the world around us.
How many times are we tempted to say, “Well , this is just boring work, so I don’t really need to show up for it fully. I don’t need to be energetic, or excellent. It’s really not an important job”? Yet when we say our job is boring, often we are merely indicating our unwillingness to show up fully for it. Failing to be a giver, we feel ungiven to. Failing to show up fully for life, our life then seems to feel empty.’
I realize now that it’s through our passions that we create our greatest connection to the divine source; whatever the passion, whether it be art or music, teaching or even computer programming. My passions are: my family, all those I love, and creativity. It’s only recently that I’ve realized how my days are driven by these passions. Knowing this gives me a new way to look at my seemingly mundane days. The ordinary truly can be extraordinary if we only shift our perspective or “Show up fully” and be a “giver” as Marianne Williamson suggests. Indeed, we are our own best connections to the universe and when our passions are driving our lives, when we’re connecting to the divine we are experiencing what M.C. Richards referred to in last week’s video, as the “crossing point”. We are experiencing wholeness.
Using a mystical wand is a perceptual choice: In any given moment, we can reach for prayer the way some people reach for cigarettes or food. Prayer is a conscious decision to realign ourselves with the divine right order, in the full awareness that without this realignment we are at the mercy of a chaotic world. And we need not be.”
I’m not suggesting that your understanding of experience of “God” be the same as mine, but I highly recommend examining the seemingly mundane in your life. If you need a more guided and structured way to do this you could try the Examen of Conscious practice of St. Ignasius that we’ve talked about a few times in the past, or simply do as I did and reflect over the day. Either way, I think you’ll be surprised at the results.
Beldon Lane, a theology professor at St. Louis University said this:
Where can I not encounter the holy has been the question of spiritual writers in every tradition and every age. ‘Whither shall I go from thy Spirit? Or whither shall I flee from thy presence?’ asked the psalmist (Ch139:V7). Once our attention is brought to focus on the masked extraordinariness of things, we are hard put to discern the allegedly profane. “
Frederick Buechner says, “all life is GRACE” and I am just now beginning to understand this truth.
I’ve counted no less than 12 examples in the course of one typical day when I am connected to divine spirit - 11 more times than I imagined. I’m beginning to believe that perhaps it’s not a matter of whether or not I’m “connected” but simply whether or not my eyes are open to it. I’m starting to wonder if there isn’t a constant connection like a huge umbilical cord of energy that connects all of us to this divine spirit, this powerful force of all that is good. Consequently, it connects all of us to each other. And there is God in that.
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Divine Spirit,
Grant that I may open my eyes to the possibility
That all life’s labors dwell in the divine
Help me to show up fully for these tasks
So that I may give and receive deeply
And with an open heart
Marianne Williamson quote from Everyday Grace page 146
Beldon Lane quote from “Mind the Light: Learning to See with Spiritual Eyes” by J. Brent Bill. Page 22
